There are two spheres of my existence. One sphere is the domain of me as a person and the second is me within the domain of the world at large. Let's talk a little bit about each today.
In the limited world of Jim as husband, father, employee, occasional athlete there is equilibrium. I guess you could say I'm failing in all aspects equally. I don't believe that, but I do feel it. As husband I'm batting .500 because of a paltry two achievements. The first was two hours of folding laundry last week in order to facilitate a ladies night out for Karen and the second was a brutal attack on the downstairs powder room which finally yielded an A- Monday afternoon.
One of the areas that I really need to work on is my give-back and charitable time. Last year, I worked on a Habitat House, built a playground and did several other events supporting charities that were primarily focused on children and young students. Since my place of employment really supports this, my only goal for this year is to do more than I did last year. There's an idea to carry forward :) Simply do better than last year.
In order to meet my obligation to those that come here expressly for the kiddie updates I offer the following.
Camden is doing very well. His moments of progress come in small steps and in sudden bursts of, "Where the fuck did that come from?!" as well. Small steps are exemplified by the improvements in communication with us and with word mastery and comprehension. He continually builds bridges of cognition and perhaps the best example of this recently was his sharing with us that he wanted to watch Thomas The Tank Engine (TTTE) on TV and then subsequently heading upstairs to play with the TTTE toys. This is a HUGE deal cognitively. It is something we wouldn't even have noticed with David, but it is something we celebrate intently with Camden and these moments are worth their weight in gold.
David is knocking it out of the park from every perspective save his challenges to control his energy and occasionally his focus. Four of five days a week David reports 'green' behavior and one day he's 'yellow'. Something I didn't understand as a young parent was to pick your battles and further to recognize the spectrum of performance versus expectations. Said simply, we could choose to focus on the one day a week that he is sub-green or we could celebrate the 90% goodness and see if that inspires him to address the remaining 10%. What I know now is that the latter is what works for David. If I knew then... Here's a chuckle via the transcript between David (7) and I (43) while I was folding laundry and he was playing on the iPad. Setting: I was having trouble distinguishing the ownership of a pair of sweatpants; were they David's or Camden's?
Daddy (holding up the pants in question): Are these you or Camden?
David (crisply): Camden's
Daddy: Are you sure?
David (sternly): I'VE SEEN HIM WEAR THEM.
At least he didn't call me a dumbass.
Karen and I get closer every moment of every day. We have our challenges as individuals, as human beings and as members of Team Preis Family, but when one of us falls short, the other is quick to recognize it and pick up the slack either by helping or forgiving. I'm not going to go on and on like I usually do, but I'll end with this: If Oprah ever needs a couple to share the secrets of how to make a relationship work - where neither partner has a net worth of a billion dollars or more - we're ready for the interview at any time. And one last thing about my wife quickly. She gives. She not only takes care of our household without fail, but she finds time to volunteer AND tutor at David's school.
As for Jim one of seven billion I am encouraged and discouraged at the same time, thus the title of today's entry.
Encouraged: Rick Perry exposes himself for the forgetful, shallow, pay-for-play non-candidate that he is.
Encouraged: Ron Paul's still in it!!! VOTE YOUR CONSCIOUS PEOPLE!!!
Discouraged: Thousands of people with no coherent message driving up municipal costs, and spewing venom on the very things that provide them with the ability to protest. The occupiers are no Civil Rights marchers. They've no shared platform unless you consider, "My life sucks and it's someone else's fault" a platform.
Discouraged: Thousands of Penn State students acting like ignorant, knee-jerk-reacting imbeciles, lamenting the firing of Joe Paterno at the additional expense, insult and injury to the young victims of the crimes at the root of the issue. There is so much that can be extrapolated from this behavior.
Encouraged: I continue to work hard and hold myself accountable for my failures and for half of my successes. I help others where I can and somehow life treats me well in the end. I do find that the more I consider others, the better off I am somehow.
I hope whoever you are and wherever you are, it's a great day for you.
Cheers!
Jim
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Monday, February 28, 2011
This is Life
It has been a while since we've shared and to be honest, the challenges seem to outshine the blessings of late. Of course this doesn't preclude one from a biased focus on the blessings and it's that perspective that we are perhaps most thankful for.
Far and away our top story is my father's stroke back on the weekend of February 11th. This event has been a significant tremor for our family as opposed to an earthquake and in more ways than we can count the impact of the stroke has been mild. The net impacts of his stroke are - as we know them today - loss of peripheral field of view in his right eye and mild, intermittent memory and cognitive dysfunction. He spent three days in ICU at Duke and was discharged with explicit instructions to chill out. Additionally his blood pressure is requiring constant monitoring and controlling it with meds is a very active endeavor. I know this event has truly given mom and dad pause and it's not a stretch to imply that some good has come of this. Dad needed to shift into a lower gear metaphorically. That shift has happened and it is now the responsibility of those around him to make sure he adapts to this new normal and doesn't push beyond what is appropriate. The fact of the matter is this: We love him dearly and without him there would be no us and the good fortunes of love we've amassed to date. We want him around for years to come and if that means expanding our responsibility in our mom's and dad's life then we are honored and ready to do so.
David continues to shine like a quasar and is already developing an subtle attorney's bent on making his point. Case in point:
David: "How fast can a human body go?"
Dad: "I would guess perhaps 580 miles an hour until stuff started to fly off like ears and fingers."
(David walks away and I think the conversation has concluded. A few minutes later...)
David: "How fast is the speed of sound?" (he knows the answer, but it will become obvious why he asks in a moment)
Dad: "I think it's about 600 MPH; lemme look it up..." "The speed of sound at sea level is some 768MPH it turns out!"
David: "You know that guy that jumped out of the balloon from 80,000 feet? They said he went a little faster than the speed of sound."
It dawned on me that what he had just done was found a way to tell his father that in fact the human body can handle speeds well in excess of my paltry 580MPH fathoming. He never said I was wrong. He never even let on that the cross examination was in process. There was no confrontation. Apparently the limits of what a six year old can teach are deeper than I previously understood. One day I'll have a stroke and when my sons speaks, I'll listen. In the end he threw me a bone...
David: "But he had protective clothing on."
Camden is doing well and continues to be mentored and educated by our extended family down at Frankie Lemmon in Raleigh. His conversations are becoming gradually more engaging and his directions and requests are certainly more direct. We are so blessed by this little gift from God who seems to know nothing but unconditional love he is on a mission to share.
That last paragraph is what I'm supposed to type. It's puts a smile on everyone's face and allows everyone to walk away sans confrontation of the realities of having a special needs child. The truly difficult part of this journey - that we've only just started - is watching the gap between Camden and typical children Camden's age grow wider. We don't dwell on this and we don't torture ourselves with the notion of what might have been - often. For all the heartache that is a one in 800 occurrence we have our son Camden and extra chromosome notwithstanding the purity of his love can be felt when he slowly rubs my arm at night as I read him a story; the target of his hugs - with ever increasing strength - always find their mark. God blessed us with perfect imperfection; a steep hill at times. But he also endowed us the love and determination to instill in Camden the fortitude to build out his world; one whose foundation is unconditional love and persistence in effort. It's Camden's world and we're at peace with the fact that we just live in it :)
Today is a beautiful day. Cloudy and 75 - 80 for a high. I am overwhelmed at work and not at work. Living can wait. Life demands a bike ride forthwith. For one day - today - I take control and make no apologies. I've no doubt work and not at work will be there when I'm done.
This is Life. We are thankful.
Far and away our top story is my father's stroke back on the weekend of February 11th. This event has been a significant tremor for our family as opposed to an earthquake and in more ways than we can count the impact of the stroke has been mild. The net impacts of his stroke are - as we know them today - loss of peripheral field of view in his right eye and mild, intermittent memory and cognitive dysfunction. He spent three days in ICU at Duke and was discharged with explicit instructions to chill out. Additionally his blood pressure is requiring constant monitoring and controlling it with meds is a very active endeavor. I know this event has truly given mom and dad pause and it's not a stretch to imply that some good has come of this. Dad needed to shift into a lower gear metaphorically. That shift has happened and it is now the responsibility of those around him to make sure he adapts to this new normal and doesn't push beyond what is appropriate. The fact of the matter is this: We love him dearly and without him there would be no us and the good fortunes of love we've amassed to date. We want him around for years to come and if that means expanding our responsibility in our mom's and dad's life then we are honored and ready to do so.
David continues to shine like a quasar and is already developing an subtle attorney's bent on making his point. Case in point:
David: "How fast can a human body go?"
Dad: "I would guess perhaps 580 miles an hour until stuff started to fly off like ears and fingers."
(David walks away and I think the conversation has concluded. A few minutes later...)
David: "How fast is the speed of sound?" (he knows the answer, but it will become obvious why he asks in a moment)
Dad: "I think it's about 600 MPH; lemme look it up..." "The speed of sound at sea level is some 768MPH it turns out!"
David: "You know that guy that jumped out of the balloon from 80,000 feet? They said he went a little faster than the speed of sound."
It dawned on me that what he had just done was found a way to tell his father that in fact the human body can handle speeds well in excess of my paltry 580MPH fathoming. He never said I was wrong. He never even let on that the cross examination was in process. There was no confrontation. Apparently the limits of what a six year old can teach are deeper than I previously understood. One day I'll have a stroke and when my sons speaks, I'll listen. In the end he threw me a bone...
David: "But he had protective clothing on."
Camden is doing well and continues to be mentored and educated by our extended family down at Frankie Lemmon in Raleigh. His conversations are becoming gradually more engaging and his directions and requests are certainly more direct. We are so blessed by this little gift from God who seems to know nothing but unconditional love he is on a mission to share.
That last paragraph is what I'm supposed to type. It's puts a smile on everyone's face and allows everyone to walk away sans confrontation of the realities of having a special needs child. The truly difficult part of this journey - that we've only just started - is watching the gap between Camden and typical children Camden's age grow wider. We don't dwell on this and we don't torture ourselves with the notion of what might have been - often. For all the heartache that is a one in 800 occurrence we have our son Camden and extra chromosome notwithstanding the purity of his love can be felt when he slowly rubs my arm at night as I read him a story; the target of his hugs - with ever increasing strength - always find their mark. God blessed us with perfect imperfection; a steep hill at times. But he also endowed us the love and determination to instill in Camden the fortitude to build out his world; one whose foundation is unconditional love and persistence in effort. It's Camden's world and we're at peace with the fact that we just live in it :)
Today is a beautiful day. Cloudy and 75 - 80 for a high. I am overwhelmed at work and not at work. Living can wait. Life demands a bike ride forthwith. For one day - today - I take control and make no apologies. I've no doubt work and not at work will be there when I'm done.
This is Life. We are thankful.
Thursday, December 30, 2010
2010 Preis Family Album
There's a little icon in the bottom right corner that's labeled "Larger View" or "Full Screen". I suggest using that button until the option is no longer available; at that time, the book show should be as big as you can make it.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Friday, June 25, 2010
My New Friend Ricky
Yesterday was a good day.
On June 3rd I was in a meeting at work and I could sense that the folks in the meeting didn't feel that the meeting was being as productive as it could be. This meeting is primarily with my seniors, but I am reasonably well respected amongst my peers as well as my seniors. When we got to the requests for new business I decided to go for it. I stood up (which is very uncommon) and made an appeal for the opportunity to run the meeting for one week using a methodology I had learned long ago at IBM. I was granted the opportunity. In the interim two weeks I was able to get the other PMs together and share my vision. I was supported by two other senior peers and a half dozen PMs. We prototyped, rehearsed, critiqued and then we delivered yesterday June 24th. The PMs nailed it, my colleague who was assigned the whip role did a great job of keeping the meeting focused and on time and, all in all, it was a rousing success. I was congratulated, recognized and elated.
Days like that at work are uncommon. There are other things I'd like to take a shot at, but right now I'll enjoy this success and try and figure out the rate of change the environment can handle, bide my capital of recent success and see if I can make it two for two in the coming months.
I left work literally buzzing and took the long way home. Down 751 to New Hope Church and then over to Yates Store road. Yates Store road actually has a "store" on it. but it's the propriety of a gentleman that sells Husqvarna lawn mowers and firewood by the cord as opposed to a convenience store. For years I've taken this route and on many a day there's been a gentleman in the front lot of the rural property who would, without fail, unabashedly share a kind wave with me as I passed by. As I turned right on Yates Store, there he was. Today an anonymous wave just wasn't going to get it. I pulled into the parking lot and drove over to my friend with no name and said, "Hi. Every day I drive by here and we wave at each other and from now on when I wave I wanna know who I'm waving to. I am Jim Preis." I extended my hand to shake - a tradition that has it's origins in demonstrating that the participants are unarmed - and as he shook my hand he said with a smile, "Well Hi there! I'm Ricky. Glad to meet you." With that I told him that now when I drove by I'd know the name of the friend that I was waving to. He smiled a kind smile as I drove away.
All days should be so good.
On June 3rd I was in a meeting at work and I could sense that the folks in the meeting didn't feel that the meeting was being as productive as it could be. This meeting is primarily with my seniors, but I am reasonably well respected amongst my peers as well as my seniors. When we got to the requests for new business I decided to go for it. I stood up (which is very uncommon) and made an appeal for the opportunity to run the meeting for one week using a methodology I had learned long ago at IBM. I was granted the opportunity. In the interim two weeks I was able to get the other PMs together and share my vision. I was supported by two other senior peers and a half dozen PMs. We prototyped, rehearsed, critiqued and then we delivered yesterday June 24th. The PMs nailed it, my colleague who was assigned the whip role did a great job of keeping the meeting focused and on time and, all in all, it was a rousing success. I was congratulated, recognized and elated.
Days like that at work are uncommon. There are other things I'd like to take a shot at, but right now I'll enjoy this success and try and figure out the rate of change the environment can handle, bide my capital of recent success and see if I can make it two for two in the coming months.
I left work literally buzzing and took the long way home. Down 751 to New Hope Church and then over to Yates Store road. Yates Store road actually has a "store" on it. but it's the propriety of a gentleman that sells Husqvarna lawn mowers and firewood by the cord as opposed to a convenience store. For years I've taken this route and on many a day there's been a gentleman in the front lot of the rural property who would, without fail, unabashedly share a kind wave with me as I passed by. As I turned right on Yates Store, there he was. Today an anonymous wave just wasn't going to get it. I pulled into the parking lot and drove over to my friend with no name and said, "Hi. Every day I drive by here and we wave at each other and from now on when I wave I wanna know who I'm waving to. I am Jim Preis." I extended my hand to shake - a tradition that has it's origins in demonstrating that the participants are unarmed - and as he shook my hand he said with a smile, "Well Hi there! I'm Ricky. Glad to meet you." With that I told him that now when I drove by I'd know the name of the friend that I was waving to. He smiled a kind smile as I drove away.
All days should be so good.
Monday, June 14, 2010
Saturday, April 24, 2010
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